How to maintain your identity at work

Spending too much time trying to please your boss and work colleagues and being in a constant state of fear that you’re not good enough, can have detrimental effects, not only on your wellbeing but also your self-identity.

Earlier this year, Rice University undertook a study, “Be yourself at work — it’s healthier and more productive”, which examines identity in the workplace.

By changing our mindset and taking a few simple steps, we can learn to maintain our identity and keep our mental health in check.

Recognise your behaviour

Initially, we might not even realise that our behaviour at work is different to how we act in our personal lives. Over time, however, you’ll start to notice that your mood changes and you lack confidence and feel like you can’t be yourself in certain situations.

Begin by listing your positive qualities and try to recognise what is missing from your personality when you’re at work. Perhaps you hold back with speaking your thoughts, you feel uncomfortable in your work clothes, or it might be that your sense of humour is missing.

There are many reasons why we might lose our identity at work, whether it’s because we’re afraid people won’t like us or that we could lose our job if we don’t fit in. If we continually strive to please others, it’s easy to lose our self-worth.

If we go for long periods of time when we feel we can’t be ourselves, we can become introverted, fearful and depressed. But the good news is, there are ways we can regain our identity.

Dress comfortably

There are many workplaces where we must dress a certain way to suit the ethos of the business and sometimes that can make you feel like you aren’t presenting the real you. However, there are ways of introducing certain aspects of clothing that help you retain your personality. Even if it’s the socks that you wear or the colour of your shirt/dress, these small changes can you make you feel more comfortable and more confident in yourself.

Dealing with negative feedback

There may be times when we receive negative feedback from our boss which knocks our confidence, but it’s important to recognise how the feedback is presented. When we’re criticised for our work, it can sometimes feel like a personal attack rather than constructive criticism.

Does your boss speak differently or behave differently towards you or are they the same with other employees? If it’s the latter, then it isn’t just you and this could reflect more on their personality than yours so try not to take the criticism personally.

However, if you feel as though it is only directed towards yourself in a negative manner, speak with your boss and ask how you can make improvements with your work. This can also give you the opportunity to discuss the way they speak to you without it appearing like you’re challenging them. Don’t let any harsh words knock your self-esteem as this can lead to self-doubt, lack of confidence and, ultimately, losing your identity.

Spend more time with people you can be yourself with

Particularly when we start a new job, we try so hard to fit in, we forget to be our natural, authentic selves. There are usually one or two people that we may gravitate towards because we feel more comfortable around them. By spending more time with these people, we’ll gain more confidence to be ourselves and show the true sides of our personality.

Make sure you also spend time with your closest friends and family outside of the workplace, as they will remind you of your positive qualities and will help you maintain your identity.

Are you a team player?

Most businesses rely on great teamwork to be truly successful. No matter what job a person has, each role makes up an important part of the bigger picture. So, for an organisation to run smoothly and achieve its goals, it’s vital for every member of staff to work effectively in a team.

In order to become a better team player, there are several attributes we can focus on developing.

Be committed to your team

Although some roles might require you to work autonomously for some of the time, undoubtedly you will also need to interact and work alongside colleagues. By being committed to your team, you should learn to listen to what others have to say, respect their opinions and be helpful whenever possible.

Take accountability

We are only human and, from time to time, we make mistakes. By shifting the blame onto someone else and denying our part in any kind of oversight or error, we’re likely to create negative feelings in the workplace. When we take accountability for our actions and take complete responsibility in our individual roles, we can avoid these kinds of negative situations and are likely to gain more respect from our colleagues. More importantly, we can learn from our mistakes and move forward with better judgement in the future.

Communicate effectively

Communication is one of the greatest parts of becoming a great team player. By sharing our ideas and taking on board the ideas of others, we open the communication gateways and create a more powerful rapport with our co-workers. By contributing ideas and actively taking part in meetings, we can inspire others by displaying a positive, can-do attitude. Try to refrain from monopolising discussions and be mindful of your body language. Making eye contact, keeping an upright posture and speaking clearly will make you appear more confident and colleagues are more likely to listen to what you have to say.

Be adaptable

To work collaboratively, we must learn to be flexible and adaptable. Some situations may arise that require us to take a different approach in our day-to-day roles and if we are able to adapt accordingly, we can encourage others to do the same - overcoming obstacles and achieving greater success.

Be reliable

We all know how frustrating it can be when someone lets the team down by not turning up, being late or not completing a task on time. One of the most important attributes of being a good team player is reliability. When our team members know that they can depend on us, we create a level of trust that is integral to becoming a successful team player.

John J. Murphy, a business specialist and author of books such as The i in Team and Pulling Together: The power of Teamwork offers some great insights into the power of teamwork as well as useful tools and techniques that can improve collaboration in the workplace.

Returning to work after the holidays

Rather than totally clearing your mind of your happy holiday memories, why not embrace all the things you loved about your holiday and incorporate them into your working day? Not only will this ease you back into your normal routine, you might just find there are some feel-good factors that you want to adopt permanently. After all, there’s no reason why we can’t feel just as happy every day of the year.

We’ve got some nifty little tips that will help you make the most of your time once you return to work - making every day count.

Read

Many of us love to get lost in a good book while we’re on holiday but what’s stopping you from picking up where you left off and imagining you’re back on your sun lounger at the side of the pool?

Treat yourself

There are no rules to say that we can only treat ourselves when it’s a special occasion so why not enjoy a spot of retail therapy and buy some new clothes for work? It might just help you feel as great as you did on holiday. Perhaps your desk could do with a little colour therapy, so treat yourself to some bright new stationary that will bring a smile to your face.

Plan something for the weekend

If your holiday hasn’t left you totally destitute, maybe make plans for the weekend. This will give you something to look forward to and keep you motivated throughout the week. How about a romantic dinner at a nice restaurant, a night out with friends or a cheeky getaway?

Book a buffer day

The thought of returning to work after a holiday can leave us feeling anxious and stressed knowing that we’ll have to face countless emails and catch up on all the work we missed while we were away. Not to mention the endless loads of washing and shopping we have to face. Booking that extra day off after we return from our holiday gives us time to get organised and acclimatise to reality, ultimately relieving some of the stress and allowing us to sleep better at night.

Take a full lunch break

Missing lunch break to catch up on work is a bad habit that many of us fall into but remember that you are entitled to your break. Making the most of this time gives us a chance to rest our minds and recharge our batteries.

Replace those times when you would be lounging in the sun or exploring an exotic location for something enjoyable in your lunch break. You might want to take a walk outside to get some fresh air – this is a great opportunity to practice mindfulness and appreciate your surroundings. Or, instead of sightseeing, maybe you could venture somewhere new and learn a bit about the area.

Enjoy a tasty treat

It’s not uncommon for us to over-indulge while we’re holiday, devouring delicious goodies without giving it a second thought, so adjusting to our usual eating routines can play havoc with our sugar cravings. Think about livening up your usual lunchtime sandwich with an exotic wrap or a something from home that will take your thoughts back to your holiday or instead of your mid-afternoon cocktail, why not stop for some flavoured water, which will also keep you hydrated and your mind alert.

For more tips on returning to work after your holiday, visit the mental health charity website, Mind.org.

Mindset affects how we approach high workload

It's World Mental Health Day - a day for raising awareness of mental health issues.

If you're at work, drowning under the various tasks you have to complete, you won't be surprised to learn that this is a common scenario in the workplace and a cause of unnecessary stress for many employees. But what can you do to deal with the increasing demands at work? Well, according to researchers Casper, Sonnetag and Tremmel, your mindset is the key. 

Their study found that employees differed in their approach to workload anticipation based on whether or not they believed stress to be harmful to their productivity and health (their stress mindset). Employees with a positive stress mindset (i.e. those who looked at work as a challenge) found coping strategies to deal with the high workloads. However, it's not just how we approach tasks that helps us improve our productivity, but also how we anticipate them. The research indicated that people respond differently to the anticipation of high workload and these differences also affect our performance. This could be because some people view a high workload as a challenge, whereas others see it as a hindrance or a threat, causing them to avoid it. 

So, what's best way of dealing with a high workload? Nurturing a positive mindset and using coping mechanisms for managing workload goes a long way according to the researchers. But most importantly, in order to maintain wellbeing and health, it's essential to have a manageable workload with time to rest and recover after each working day.

Further reading 

Casper, A, Sonnentag, S, and Tremmel, S (2017), Mindset matters: the role of employees’ stress mindset for day- specific reactions to workload anticipation, European Journal of Work and Organizational Psychology, 26, 798-810.

Wellness at work

RAND Europe, a non-profit research and analysis organisation, undertakes ongoing studies into wellbeing in the workplace and states: “Emerging research indicates that a healthier workforce is a more productive workforce, with fewer sick days taken and higher productivity when at work”.

When we take into consideration the amount of time we spend at work and the constant pressures we face each day, it’s no surprise that many of us, at some point in our careers, have taken time off work due to stress, anxiety or depression.

But with forward-thinking employers who recognise the importance of wellbeing at work, many companies are now putting wellbeing practices into place. Wellness programs that include yoga, meditation, free counselling sessions, training courses on mental wellbeing, fitness challenges, or gym memberships can help maintain a healthier workforce, which ultimately results in fewer sick days, higher retention, increased productivity and a happier work environment.

Middleton Murray, a UK based apprenticeship training provider, takes an holistic approach to wellbeing in the workplace and since introducing meditation techniques using the popular Headspace app, they have managed to retain all of their 120 staff since the initiative began.

Innocent Smoothies is a well known brand that puts wellbeing at the forefront of its success. The company provides many perks that contribute daily to the wellbeing of its staff. Free gym membership, flexible working hours, yoga club, free breakfasts, and training courses for understanding mental wellbeing are just a few of the initiatives that the brand has implemented.

There are lots of wellbeing initiatives that can be cost effective, providing benefits for both the company and employee. Good employee wellbeing increases productivity and motivation; boosts team spirit; and reduces stress, anxiety and depression.

Onsite yoga

By operating a yoga class at lunchtime, it not only encourages staff to take a break, it can also improve levels of concentration, ease muscle pain, and increase energy levels.

Nutritious snacks

Employers can try avoiding the mid-afternoon slump by ditching the vending machine and providing staff with a choice of healthy snacks such as fresh fruit and vegetables.

Flexible hours

We all have different commitments and responsibilities in our lives, therefore not everyone works to their optimum at the same times of day. Flexible working hours allow staff to work the hours that best suit their personal lives which, in turn, can reduce stress and enable them to focus better on the job at hand.

Walk or cycle to work initiative

As well as playing a part in reducing our carbon footprint by operating a walk or cycle to work initiative, we can help improve both mental and physical wellbeing of the workforce. Under the government’s Cycle to Work Scheme, employers can loan out bicycles to their staff as a tax-free benefit.

Training workshops on mental wellbeing

Mental health issues are often misunderstood in the workplace and as a result, people are reluctant to seek help. In addition, managers and colleagues may not recognise the issues that an employee is facing. Training workshops can include topics such as mindfulness, stress, assertiveness, managing difficult people, managing conflict at work, effective listening, motivational interviewing, etc. They can help provide relevant and helpful information to everyone or specific groups of people as well as guidance on techniques that people can use at home to alleviate symptoms. 

Counselling or CBT sessions for employees

More and more companies are offering counselling and cognitive-behaviour therapy (CBT) sessions to their employees. These are evidence-based approaches that can help employees improve mental wellbeing and also support recovery from stress, anxiety, low mood and psychological difficulties.

If you'd like to find out how First Psychology Assistance can help your organisation better understand and improve the mental health of employees, visit our website www.firstpsychology-assistance.co.uk https://www.firstpsychology-assistance.co.uk/services.php

How to gain respect at work

There’s always that one person who seems to command respect from bosses and colleagues without even trying. Perhaps on the outside that’s how we see it but, the truth is, they probably work extremely hard to gain that level of respect.

If you want to achieve the same kind of respect at work, you should try to recognise the kind of traits that others look up to.

Show respect

There’s no point complaining that nobody gives you respect if you are incapable of giving it to others. How we speak to people and interact with them can have a powerful impact on how they treat us in return. When we are polite, attentive and understanding towards others, they are more likely to reciprocate.

Remain professional

It can be tempting at times, particularly at the annual party, to be the centre of attention, but remember that getting attention and gaining respect are quite different. It might seem like fun at the time to have one too many drinks and hog the dance floor, however, this could lead to negative comments and gossip once you’re back in the office.

Don’t gossip

There are many places of work where idle gossip is rife. Not only can this create a toxic environment and be damaging to the wellbeing of others, it’s not the way to gain respect. You might believe that joining in with gossip is a great way to fit in with your colleagues but in the long run, it can have the opposite effect.

Be confident

There’s a difference between having self-confidence and being arrogant, so be careful to get the right balance. When we're self-confident, we have belief in ourselves and have the skills or qualities to back it up, yet arrogance can be seen as egotistical and smug so try to remain modest and humble.

Take accountability for your actions

It can be extremely frustrating when something goes wrong at work and the person responsible doesn’t take accountability and, worse still, they try to put the blame onto someone else. We all make mistakes from time to time and by owning up to them, we can find ways to rectify the issue. You’ll find that your colleagues and boss will have much more respect for the fact that you owned up to your mistake, and it is more likely to be quickly forgotten.

Help others to succeed

One of the best ways to create a more positive environment at work and to earn respect is by helping others whenever possible. We all know how frustrating it can be when you're unsure of something and no one is prepared to help and would rather keep their knowledge under wraps so that they can receive all the glory. If you go out of your way and sacrifice some of your time to give help when it’s needed, people will most definitely respect you for it.

Work hard

You can do all of the above but if you turn up for work late every day, take too many breaks and don’t complete the work you’re supposed to have done, your colleagues won’t respect you and, chances are, your boss could give you a warning.

In order to gain the respect that we’d like at work, we must consider what kind of character traits and qualities we admire in others and demonstrate the same.

In 2018, Harvard Business Review produced this interesting report based on research that explore respect in the workplace.

Stepping up to a challenge

There are many reasons why we might want to feel appreciated or recognised for the work we do in our job; we may want to feel good about ourselves, dream of a promotion, or gain respect from our colleagues.

So, how do you feel when your boss has chosen you to undertake a challenge at work? Initially, you might feel excited or self-satisfied that you have been trusted with the important task. But what do you do when those initial feelings begin to turn into fear and anxiety?

Yes, it feels great that you’ve been given such a responsibility but perhaps you start to question whether you’re capable of stepping up to the challenge.

If feelings of self-doubt have started creeping in, you’re probably questioning your abilities to succeed. You may be fearful that you won’t achieve the desired results, you can’t handle the extra workload or you’re not sure how to even go about the task at hand.

Overcoming the fear

Fear can lead to negative self-talk and can even, in some cases, convince you that you’re simply not good enough. But you must remember the positive feelings you had before fear took over your mindset. It’s likely that, before you were given the challenge, you believed in your abilities and you were full of self-worth.

Make a note of everything you have accomplished so far in your job and all the positive skills and qualities you are proud of. Don’t forget that your boss must also have seen your value to consider you for the task in the first place.

Once you start to focus on the positives, your confidence will start to grow, and the niggling seeds of doubt will fade into the background.

Challenges are so-called for a reason and most likely you’ll come across problems along the way. It’s your job to find solutions rather than make excuses. Understandably, you might be worrying about the security of your job if you don’t succeed, but don’t forget to think about the rewards when you do succeed.

Think of the challenge as a series of tasks that will test your determination and cognitive skills. As you start to overcome each step, you will prove to yourself that you are the right person for the challenge. Compliment yourself for every obstacle that you overcome and savour that incredible feeling of satisfaction, which will spur you on to achieve the end goal.

Ask for help

Don’t be afraid to ask co-workers or those more qualified in relevant areas for help. Management and organisation skills are equally as important and can often lead to making the wisest decisions. Building allies can be a smart move.

If you’re really unsure of the best action to take during the challenge, think of several solutions and perhaps sound them out with your boss. That way they will recognise that you’re not just approaching them with problems but rather offering alternative strategies to overcome them.

The more times you step up to a challenge and achieve the end goal, the more you’ll grow in confidence, making the next challenge easier and less daunting. Try to remember the familiar saying: “challenges are opportunities in disguise”.