Become more likeable in the workplace

It’s human nature to want to be liked and accepted for who we are, and this isn’t just when we’re children at school, but it also continues into adulthood and the workplace.

Although some people don’t care about whether they’re liked or not, for others, it can be much more difficult.

What are the benefits of being liked at work?

• It can increase self-confidence
• A sense of belonging
• Friendship
• To prevent loneliness
• To feel respected
• Career progression

There are many reasons why we might want to be liked and when we’re not, we might experience negative emotions, thoughts and feelings such as lack of self-worth, anxiety and fear. Very often a toxic work environment is caused by a clash of personalities, so it’s understandable that we would want to avoid this. In an article published by the BBC, Mitch Prinstein examines in more detail the effects and importance of popularity in the workplace.

Tips to becoming more likeable at work

We wouldn’t encourage changing your fundamental personality to fit in, but there are small actions you can take to help you become more likeable if you feel this is an issue.

1. Rather than find problems at work, find solutions. Your boss might not thank you for pointing out everything that is wrong, but they may thank you for offering ways to improve systems. 
2. Try not to compete with work colleagues. Always try your best at work but don’t compare yourself or try to outsmart others just to score points.
3. Accept responsibility if you make a mistake and don’t point the blame at someone else. This will only cause animosity and a lack of trust.
4. Smile more and use peoples’ names when you talk to them. This might seem like a simple thing to do but it can put people at ease and make them warm to you.
5. Be helpful whenever possible but also accept help when you need it. It’s a thin line, but don’t be a pushover either if it is likely to cause you stress.
6. Don’t ignore criticism, use it to improve where you can.
7. Be reliable and timely.
8. Don’t gossip about your boss or colleagues. It’s not nice to be the subject of idle gossip and it can create an unwelcome atmosphere. The chances are people will like you less if you speak negatively of others.
9. Don’t be afraid to ask questions or contribute your ideas in meetings but also know when to listen and when to speak.
10. Don’t exclude colleagues from social events.
11. Think before you speak. Take a moment to ask yourself whether what you are about to say is hurtful or offensive to someone else. To become more likeable, it’s important to speak to people in a manner that you would like to be spoken to.
12. Perform small acts of kindness. Perhaps if you’re going to make a coffee, ask your colleagues if they would like one, or be flexible with your lunch breaks if someone else needs to take theirs at the same time.